Jeremy Corbyn was slammed by the media this week for suggesting a maximum wage cap. Corbyn always seems to be on the wrong end of the media. “He’s totally nuts,” everyone says. “What an idiot,” they say. “Bless him,” they sigh. And they’re right. HOW DARE HE SUGGEST SUCH A LUDICROUS IDEA. HOW DARE HE…
I’m very hungry. This is a table. Is this a fast train? Why is not moving? It’s moving. Why are we not eating if this is a table? A mother sits on her phone instead of talking to her four-year-old son. I catch the little boy’s eye and he looks fed-up. Like he has…
We haven’t sat on the sofa since you left. It was yours. We can’t touch it. For breakfast we all eat Weetabix with box-milk. No one has been to the shop. No one has left the house. There are tears at the bottom of the stairs each morning. We are determined to succeed for you.…
That’s right, tape over your webcam like Zuckerberg does, because the government is on to you, and if it’s not the government, then it’s a greeb in his mum’s basement watching you bash one off to the new Miley Cyrus video. Mrs. “Un-elected” May has just pushed through the most savage surveillance bill in the…
Reginald. That’s my name. I’m a whale. A big old whale. Oooooooooooooooooorrrwh. Just yesterday I saw two dolphins, eighty tuna fish and sixty jellyfish get scooped up in a man-net. Men eat dolphins because they think that they taste like kindness. Men eat dolphins because they think dolphins are like them. Tuna fish are not…
Terrible things happen all the time. Sometimes they are more terrible than others. 2016 is just another year. Time keeps ticking by. As a reminder that life goes on, things get better, and everything changes, here’s a list of all the terrible things that have happened in years ending with 6 (just in case you…
Rudimentary drawings show humans have always loved touching each other.
Could Christmas come at a better time? Trump is President, the world is melting, the alt-right is on the rise, ignorance is rife, refugees are freezing on the streets, bombs keep falling, Russia keeps grinning sadistically at me, Yemen is on the brink of collapse, North Korea keeps blowing stuff up, people are starving, old people…
Stand up and write. No one is going to write for you. Write for yourself. Not for others. People care what you have to say. Say it.
Seal Matches 